Ramana Maharshi and the Cult of "Pure Awareness."

Who is THE definitive poster boy of modern Advaita Vedanta (Non-Duality), beloved by traditionalists and progressives alike? Without a doubt it would have to be Ramana Maharshi. For those who have been living in a hermit's cave for the last several decades, Ramana had a panic attack when he was 16 years old, described here in his own words:

"...a sudden violent fear of death overtook me. There was nothing in my state of health to account for it, and I did not try to account for it or find out whether there was any reason for the fear. I just felt "I am going to die" and began thinking what to do about it. (...)

The shock of the fear of death drove my mind inwards and I said to myself mentally, without actually framing the words: "Now death has come; what does it mean? What is it that is dying? This body dies." And at once I dramatized the occurrence of death. I lay with my limbs stretched out stiff as though rigor mortis had set in and imitated a corpse so as to give greater reality to the inquiry. I held my breath and kept my lips tightly closed so that no sound could escape, so that neither the word "I" nor any other word could be uttered. "Well then," I said to myself, "this body is dead. It will be carried stiff to the burning ground and there burnt and reduced to ashes. But with the death of this body am I dead? Is the body I? It is silent and inert but I feel the full force of my personality and even the voice of the 'I' within me, apart from it. So I am Spirit transcending the body. The body dies but the Spirit that transcends it cannot be touched by death. That means I am deathless Spirit." 

After this transformative experience, Ramana maintained silence for many years before eventually being recognized as a guru and having an ashram built up around him. He passed away in 1950.

Among many modern spiritual folks, it seems that Ramana is held in even higher esteem than the iconic and ever-popular Jesus Christ or Gautama Buddha. From all accounts, he was a really nice guy and that probably makes him more of a lightning rod for worship than many modern gurus who have been caught taking part in one or more criminal behaviors. A thriving tourist trade has sprung up around Ramana's ashram in Thiruvannammalai, India and pictures and quotes of his flood social media. The core of his philosophy is that we are an absolute, transcendental Self (capitol "S") that is synonymous with pure awareness. This is the same idea as the ancient Hindu concept of Brahman - the singular, unchanging, timeless reality.

I was once a believer in these concepts but part of my personal experience was a deep, spontaneous questioning of all of the things I accepted as truth. Then I realized that I had just internalized another conceptual system by accepting the tenets of non-duality. I find it impossible to believe any of these absolutist statements anymore so, when I hear my friends discussing them, I recognize the same religious fervor I once held for these ideas. I was also once very good at explaining these beliefs to others and could often cause them to have an "aha" moment and corresponding dopamine rush. Some might even call it an "enlightenment" experience! Many people came to me to talk about these things when I was speaking about them with certainty. Now I wonder if the fascination with "transcendence" is really just hopeful thinking and wish fulfillment. 

I felt, as many do who come in contact with the concepts of Advaita Vedanta, that I had reached "the end of the road" and that I had finally encountered "absolute knowledge." One hallmark of the form is extremely grandiose statements expressed with total authority. "I was never born and I will never die." "I am infinite, timeless awareness." "I am the Truth beyond all appearances." "I am the unchanging reality." When I was really taken with these ideas, I would tell them to my wife and she'd point out that they sound like the insane ramblings of a complete megalomaniac.

Today a friend posted some of these types of statements and, in the resulting discussion, Ramana was quoted and later in the conversation I wrote, "so many beliefs and philosophies are just the fear of death in action." Then I remembered Ramana's "awakening" story and it dawned on me that his entire philosophy was born in the fear of a panic attack!

If you've never had a panic attack, it is a powerful, visceral experience. The easiest way to describe it is the total, overwhelming fear of imminent death. I had many panic attacks in 2013 due to adrenal exhaustion. I eventually got rid of them by nutritional therapy and lifestyle changes but I can still remember their intensity. I often wonder if most "transcendental" beliefs are rooted in the fear of death, for example - the Christian belief in heaven. How different is it to believe that you are a birthless, deathless, eternal "Self"? This idea can feel really good but does it have anything to do with reality? I don't know, and I would be willing to bet Ramana didn't either. Why would we assume that any other human being is closer to truth than us or has esoteric knowledge that we lack?

I'm not saying this is necessarily the way it was but bear with me for a moment... WHAT IF, as a boy Ramana was faced with the idea of death and his young mind couldn't handle the overpowering fear? WHAT IF his entire philosophy was built on the DENIAL of this fear and an escape into wishful "magical" thinking? In his "awakening" story, it says his limbs went stiff and he imagined what it was like to be dead but was he REALLY dead? Of course not.

What do we really KNOW about death? Most of us know what it can look like from the outside but what do we ACTUALLY know about what the experience is like? Yes, we can believe what one "authority" or another has said about it but what do we KNOW about it? I will admit that I don't know ANYTHING about it and that suits me just fine. It seems we can only fear our IDEAS about what we don't know. No ideas = no fear. 

In all of the absolutist concepts, I find a denial of one's unknowing and of one's mortality, I also find a denial of the mercurial, ever-transforming nature of the observable universe. What if the idea of an absolute is just a false refuge for a mind in fear? We see what believers through history have done to protect their beliefs, their certainty. People were burned at the stake for even daring to question the "absolute" knowledge of those in power and still are today. 

These bodies are going to die. My Mother died last December and I went through the whole process with her, excluding the actual moment of her death (she was being cleaned by a nurse when it happened). It was a roller-coaster ride of emotions and experiences. I can see how someone faced with the heaviness of what is happening might want to cling to some comforting beliefs but I have deeply believed and then let go of so many things. What are we REALLY certain about? What if the whole human religious and spiritual enterprise is born in the inability to experience life as it is WITHOUT trying to explain the shadows away? What if we FACE the fact of death and recognize that we don't really know about what it's like to die? Why should we want to deny the natural cycles of birth and death? I told my Mom that consciousness either continues after death or it doesn't and that neither option is that bad. I won't claim to know the answer either way.

In my life, there have been what have felt like profound insights. The first was the recognition that there is something deeper to me than who I thought I was. This aspect can be called consciousness or awareness (among other things) and it must be present for us to experience anything. Many in the Advaita Vedanta movement apparently see this fact and then somehow imagine that this awareness is apart from life. Ironically, this venerated "Pure Awareness" is just another dualistic conceptualization. Life is everything happening, INCLUDING awareness. If we look at our own experience we don't find consciousness apart from what is perceived. In the name of "non-duality," many just imagine another form of separation - "Pure Awareness" from the rest of existence. Though I once believed in this division, this is not my direct experience. 

I can see that often, when we recognize the uncertainty inherent in life we reach out for something "eternal." In seeing death and pain, we seek a way to transcend these and there are plenty of philosophies and religions that claim to offer such transcendence, the cost of admission is belief in the system. Non-duality is no different. Once I started seeing that my new found "absolute truth" was merely just another conceptual system and started sharing these realizations, one of my friends who was still a believer asked me, "What happened to you, you used to be so clear?" I responded, "Every orthodoxy must have it's heresy." I understand the fear that would lead one into absolutist concepts. I have shared this fear. Now I find total security in letting go of the concepts. I see all of our beliefs about the nature of reality as mental poison and avoid them like the plague. Some of the poison is very sweet tasting but toxic, nonetheless. 

We over-thinking primates easily get lost in descriptions. We mistake our concepts for actuality. In my opinion it's so much easier if we can suspend our beliefs and just be openly aware of what is happening. As far as I can tell, our own life experience is the closest we will ever get to any sort of "truth."

I'm not saying that Ramana was wrong, how could I know one way or the other? Many seem to enjoy is teachings and I think there's merit in that, I'm just asking why we should accept the word of ANY external authority as gospel Truth. Instead of parroting ancient, dead "wisdom," I personally feel that we would be better served by looking at life for ourselves. For me, the greatest realization was how little I actually know. It was earth-shaking in it's implications and it freed me from a great many illusions that I had up to that point called "Truth" (with a capitol "T" - of course)!

Obviously I'm no more of an authority than you or anyone else, just sharing the way I see things. I try to keep an open mind towards whatever it seems like life is showing me at the moment. Whatever our beliefs about the nature of life and the universe are, there is so much beyond them.

"Myth of the Ego" nearly done

My second ND work, "Myth of the Ego" is nearly done. I project that, with an introduction, etc, that it will be around 100 pages. It has been a simple, easy process--basically a case of automatic writing. Ideas came "down the pipe" fully formed and I just wrote them down. It seems that there has been no or at least very little personal involvement.

I met some nice folks yesterday who are interested in "the subject". I told them midway through our discussion that talking about the subject with earnest people always makes me feel high as a kite. The illusion (of separation) is seen through, revealing the ever-present being/consciousness/bliss.

I also got some very sad news about a family friend who died and I cried like a baby. I would like to help dismantle the idea that when one lives life (mostly) not believing in the self image/ego idea, there is no more sadness and life becomes our image of perfection. Consciousness is challenging and presents a lot of complex situations and scenarios. The only way, in my humble opinion, to navigate it happily is to have a very simple approach. NOTHING could be simpler than the open, crystal-clear, field of awareness. No matter what traumas and dramas afflict us in life, it is unscathed, available and omnipresent. It is peace in the seeming chaos of life. By grace it is shown that this serenity is always available, here and now, as what I AM. Also, it is known that it is OK for the human element to express itself as it does. There is not one atom or particle of creation that exists on its own in a vacuum--all is one. There is no division between awareness and the world that appears within and of it.

A new book

I'm working on a new book to be titled "The Myth of the Ego". My aim is to show the ego idea for the hollow concept that it is. I'm thinking it'll be around 60 pages and hopefully printed on hemp paper as I see that great plant as a solution for many of the problems facing humankind. I'm not sure how long it will be before the book is released but material is coming "down the pipe" quite quickly. I am wanting this book to have a more ecological bent, showing how belief in the ego idea is the cause of much environmental destruction and discord. Much of the book will be short sayings. I am trying to pare the language down to the most essential. Stay tuned!

If you meet Ramana on the road, kill him.

As of NOW, I am officially saturated with Ramana Maharshi quotes. While it's true that he had a great, simple way of expressing things, to deify him and think that he had something that we don't is a HUGE mistake. His life was no more sacred than yours. You are no less a perfect expression of the infinite than he was. He is kind of the ultimate non-duality poster boy with his ascetic, slender body and loin cloth but it would be silly to make some kind of template out of his image, to assume that his lifestyle made him closer to God/truth than we are. I very much respect Ramana, his eloquent pointers and his (reportedly) kind demeanor but I don't worship him as any holier than anyone else. Love is reverence for everything, the innate knowing that life in ALL of its expressions is sacred.

I am a "liver", I like to enjoy life. It is no more sacred to meditate in a cave than to have a beer in a pub. Both appearances are expressions of the unmanifest, the aware emptiness at the heart of life. That anything appears at all is amazing! It is a fabulous, inexplicable miracle.


Wherever you are,
well there you go,
you've got to admit,
it's a hell of a show!

Radio interview

To anyone who is interested, here is a link to an interview with me on the radio show, "Conversations with Avant-garde Sages with Trip Overholt and John Troy. They have a new show every Tuesday between noon and 1pm. They are based out of Chapel Hill, NC at WCOM 103.5 FM but you can listen to it anywhere in the world using this link and clicking on the red button at the right. All of their shows are archived as well on the same page. Enjoy!

Oneness

When the thought story of separation is no longer believed in then life is experienced as oneness.

In oneness, all dualities are seamlessly merged as that which knows them. This is already and always the case but gets overlooked in favor of fascination with concepts, selflessly and effortlessly arising in oneness.

What is already present

The thought of a future enlightenment keeps one distracted from what is already present.

While identified with a certain portion of the appearance that we call "me", we feel isolated, limited and afraid. This contraction doesn't feel good or right (it's a dis-ease), so we seek a way out of it. Some "spiritual teachers" might have some suggestions how we achieve awakening to escape this state of suffering. In the hoping and striving for that better future state, we miss what is already the case, here and now. 

The "me" is just a thought story. It is a conceptual bundling of certain perceptions into a nonexistent separate self. If that story is not believed in or pauses for a moment then it is seen that there is an open, sentient space in which thoughts and other forms appear. This openness knows no boundaries or limitations and has no problems. This is what we are, not the fleeting images. Please don't take my word for it though, look for yourself. Any believed in concept, including that of non-duality is detrimental to direct seeing. Being (shared by all) is not a concept.

"You are close to attainment!"

A young student of zen asked his wizened old master how to tell if he was near enlightenment.
His master replied: "When you can pee two streams at will, you are close to attainment."
The student knew what he had to do so, every time he urinated, he started trying to force his urine into two streams. He started drinking more water so he could piss more often and he struggled and pushed to make this happen.
After two years of trying day and night, he gave up.
He went to his master and said: "Master, I have tried for a very long time to piss in two streams and found that it can't be done. I have given up."
The master replied: "Now, you are close to attainment!"
The next time the student peed, without even trying, the miraculous happened.

Whatever works.

Whatever works is fine. There are a million different ways to say what is being said. There are an endless variety of words that the subject could be cloaked in. There are paths that appeal to heart, mind and body. Some explain it with concepts such as God and Goddess. Some use ideas such as Mind and no-mind, Self and no-self to attempt to point at "it". Some say it is the only thing we can know, others call it the ultimate Mystery. Some call it "emptiness" and some say "fullness". Some don't think about it at all and never will and that's perfectly appropriate too. All of these words represent the seeking of a transpersonal understanding--a perspective that isn't limited by narrow definitions of self, space and time.

My expression is no better than anyone else's. If you find it helpful, that's good. If not, that's fine too. All words come from and are known by the same source, regardless of if they seem to be clear or confused.

To me, it is important to be able to put aside the words, no matter how cherished they are. In this moment, without clinging to conceptual models, what IS? If we can briefly set aside our ideas about the nature of existence, what is left? What is our direct (non-conceptual) experience in this moment?

Love...

Love is God recognizing itself.

For folks for whom the word "God" has negative connotations: Love is the infinite recognizing itself.

While mistaking arising concepts for truth, we believe in a complex world of separate objects. When no longer confounded by the thought story, we recognize the entire universe as our Self. This is unconditional love.

Who am I?

I am not a "teacher". Teaching and learning are useful when learning functional knowledge but being/existence can't be taught. If being didn't exist, you wouldn't be reading these words that I am typing. Presence is already present and doesn't need to be learned. We all ALREADY share this common awareness. Beware of those who would sell it to you.

The personal is the perfect expression of the infinite

With the human species, it seems that the development of the ego obscures our unity with all things and their source. We can trace back all of our "problems" to this idea of separation. Why did such a concept arise? In the appearance, humans have a highly (some might say "over") developed brain and the capacity for abstract thought. This ability to think abstractly is useful in solving functional problems but we don't stop there, we try to understand ourselves and the universe we live in with it. This leads to a self image and then a concept of the universe, apart from oneself. This is the primary (first) dualistic notion from which all others arise. While living under this assumption of separation, life seems extremely complex and fearsome as one has become identified with a particular body/mind appearance and fears its destruction.

What has really happened, though? We're we ever apart? Of course not. Even from a purely materialistic standpoint, we are intimately connected to the universe from the moment of conception. The body is nothing other than the elements of the planet configured in a certain pattern and we would die in moments without air, water and food. Take a step further and you are in the unified field of physics where all matter is really just energy in motion and we know that energy cannot be created or destroyed.

So what is life? Why is all of this happening? Did God make a huge mistake by creating humanity, inviting evil into the world? No. Everything that appears, including the human race with all of it's ignorance and knowledge, beauty and ugliness is the perfect expression of the infinite. It is all the only way it can be. Humans have done what any species would do given our capabilities. It is leading to a mass-extinction event as have happened before in Earth's history. We ARE a mass-extinction event. At the same time, many people are waking up to the fact that we aren't separate from nature or eachother. Whatever happens, though, is the appearance of God. Every human with all of their particular quirks and traits is the expression of the divine. Even the sense of individuality, the ego, is a totally impersonal arising.

There is no way you can lose oneness. You can be ignorant of it but that doesn't mean you aren't part of it. Whatever you think you are, you are God playing a role. To harm another or to harm the planet is to harm yourself. There's no point in making an image of any of this. The awareness by which you know the world is the absolute. You are that without question.

*

All categories are arbitrary intellectual constructs. There is no mind or body or any "thing" for that matter. There is only the living light of awareness that appears as the universe of form while still retaining its pristine, incorruptible essence. 

This is already the case and cannot be made "more so" by the efforts of an imaginary separate entity.

Conversations with Avant-garde Sages

I will be on the radio show, Conversations with Avant-garde Sages on WCOM 103.5 FM Chapel Hill and Carrboro, NC on Tues Nov 15th from noon to 1pm. They stream the broadcast online as well. They have shows every Tuesday, schedule here. Enjoy!

The most radical expression of spirituality

The most radical expression of spirituality is ordinariness. I met the sage John Troy (also known as The Wizard) yesterday. You can read the details of his life story here and he also makes his books "Wisdom's Soft Whisper" and "The Human Gospel of Ramana Maharshi" available for free here. I am reading the Human Gospel now. In it, John shows the human side of Ramana. Some who would choose to worship him as something super-human didn't like the book that reveals an ordinary man with an extraordinary understanding.

I have met some "spiritual superstars" who radiate an air of specialness. You can tell when they walk in a room by the way that they hold themselves that they are "different". With John, there were no airs of superiority or fronts, there was just sitting together and sharing and a deep sharing it was. Some people, by their open presence embody oneness. It is not a "you and me" or an "us and them" duality game that is being played but a simple basking in the universal awareness that is the true source and heart of life. I am that. You are that. It ALL is that.

Thank you John. I only found out about you a week ago but being with you, your wife and companions was like being with a group of life-long friends. I say "yes" to your message of true spiritual equality--non-duality.

Death, obsession of the ego

Death is an endless object of fascination for the ego idea. Interestingly enough, death isn't an object and, in an honest examination, we can't state authoritatively that there is such a thing as an object at all. Death and decay are one of the transitional forms of appearances as are birth and growth. Every form comes into appearance at some point and disappears at another. This is readily observable in life. By what trait or capacity is this known? Consciousness.

Some say that consciousness is the eternal principle. Obviously it isn't as transient as the perceptions that appear within it but still consciousness (in the traditional understanding of that word) gives way to unconsciousness.What is this entire process known by? THAT is the absolute. That within which all experiences arise and fade. It is that which gives rise to the appearance of life and death and is beyond both. Only appearances are born and die. Life is the timeless show of the infinite.

Advaita is not complex

All that is ever being pointed to is the simple fact of being--the presence that all experiences and sensations appear in. It is impossible to lose this. At this moment, fingers are typing on a keyboard and I glance out of the window at the brilliant colors of changing leaves. This is the way being is appearing at the moment. Now, in this moment, something different is appearing but only because consciousness is present.

The ever changing colors, forms and other perceptions are the way the absolute sees itself. The absolute is that which registers all--pre-conceptual and self illuminating. There is nothing apart from this. Where ever "you" are is only where this is. Without this, nowhere, no one or nothing would manifest.

More stores

Blessed Disillusionment is now also available from Barnes and Noble and Buy.com.

Which Advaita?

Scott: I enjoy reading your pointers and posts.  Great content.  I do have one question I hope you can shed some light on.

I discovered Advaita Vedanta recently, a couple of months ago.  More recently, I have stumbled upon a "different" philosophy, the followers of which call "True Advaita".  Yours is what they call "Neo Advaita", and of course they say it lacks truth, substance, and is a perversion of the "real thing".  From what I can tell, "true" advaita requires me to basically quit my job, move to India, learn Sanskrit, and spend an undetermined amount of time sitting at the feet of a guru who also has dedicated his life to advaita.  Since I don't really care to abandon my family or my career to become "realized", this caused me to basically abandon the idea of ever escaping the karmic cycle of rebirth in this lifetime.  Maybe next time around.

But then I found your site.  So here it is:  Which advaita is true?  Why?  You speak of kindness as being the fruit of realization.  If nothing is real, why be kind?  You see where I'm going.  Anything you can offer to help me figure this out is much appreciated.

Morgan: Hey Scott. My book "Blessed Disillusionment" was published recently and in it I have a chapter that quotes extensively from "Crest Jewel of Discrimination", a classical Advaita Vedanta text. I also suggest the Ashtavakra Gita to my readers. In it, I also say: "What in the hell is neo-Advaita? Advaita means not two, non-duality. So there is a new non-duality as opposed to an old one? Once again, thought makes distinctions where there are none."

Dennis Waite seems to be one of the people who coined the term "neo-Advaita" but I've emailed extensively with him and he admits that Sailor Bob and John Wheeler's approach has value for those who are ready and I couldn't agree more. It really comes down to seeing that seeking isn't getting one anywhere and that the wild goose chase could go on forever. Why not see what is here now instead of looking to an imaginary future for satisfaction?

Some say you have to study scripture and follow a guru for years before realization can happen but the respected sage Ramana Maharshi realized the Self at the ripe young age of 16 through self inquiry, without a guru. To me, "realization" means seeing past the arbitrary conceptual frameworks of thought to the common ground of "being/consciousness/bliss". The absolute is always present and appears as the world of form. Thought, one of the aspects of the world of form, describes what appears as being separate objects apart from a subject who sees but, in our own direct experience, we see the unity of consciousness and its objects. If they were isolated from each other, life would not be. It is all one unified movement--non-duality, Brahman, God, whatever we want to call it.

As a hobby, I have read a lot about cults. Often, in groups headed by a charismatic leader, you hear reports of abuses at the hands of this person who is supposed to be an enlightened being. It seems that this cruelty still shows that, deep down within them, they believe they are separate from and better than their followers. If you don't believe in this concept of "higher and lower", i.e.--duality, then you treat others with the same love and respect you would like to be shown. That is why I say kindness is the proof. Some talk about non-duality and high minded concepts but their abusiveness reflects that they still believe in the self idea (ego).

I don't claim to be an authority on these things, I just try to communicate how I see it. In the absence of belief in the divisions of thought, there is effortless oneness. This is our direct experience.

Scott: What you say makes a lot of sense and resonates with me.  It seems to be common sense.  I already know what I am, what everything is, so what am I expecting to accomplish by more seeking?

Thank you so much!

My book, "Blessed Disillusionment" is now for sale on Amazon

Link here. Thanks to Julian and Catherine at Non Duality Press and John Wheeler for his kind words.